Here's a short read (it's clean) all about the F-Word. It's a fine, not foul, fable finessed from F words: nouns, verbs, prepositions, adjectives. Glossary included.
Finn French Fish Feud: The F-Word Story
by Kenneth John Anderson
This fun F-Word story was quite an exercise for the author, one of my brother's good friends and classmates from high school.
Adults have lamented about the sorry state of the youth throughout history:
The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.
This quote has been attributed to Socrates in the 4th century B.C.
But it has been suggested it really was "a summary of general complaints about the youth by the ancient Greeks, as written in a 1907 dissertation by a student, Kenneth John Freeman."
In 1916, Lajos Tihanyi (29 October 1885 – 11 June 1938), a Hungarian painter and lithographer, painted the above portrait of Andor Halasi, a literary critic.
What is a critic?
It may be a simple question with an obvious answer.
1a: one who engages often professionally in the analysis, evaluation, or appreciation of works of art or artistic performances
a literary critic a film critic a theater critic
b: one who expresses a reasoned opinion on any matter especially involving a judgment of its value, truth, righteousness, beauty, or technique
Critics of the new law say that it will not reduce crime.
2: one given to harsh or captious judgment
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Opinions on writing fall in the category of literary critic, such as Andor Halasi in the portrait. And as writers, we face many critics--the harshest of all from ourselves.
Let's look at definiton 2 of critic: one given to harsh or captious judgment
In general, criticism is the easiest thing in the world to dish out. The critic may not be qualified in the field. He/she can be a drive-by snipe, whose motives are far from professional, never the less construction.
Yet, an unkind word, true or not, can break a spirit...derail a career. Resilience, though, allows the artist to keep on going, keeping in this mind:
“There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.”
I remember in college, when stung by a roommate's criticism of my choice of studies. I shared my hurt with one of my professors. He gave me a copy of a newspaper clip, which he kept in his wallet. Clearly, the advice was precious to him.
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;
who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming;
but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
I received the Teddy Roosevelt quote over 45 years ago. Since then, my professor who gave it to me has passed away. But his encouragement during that low time gave me the courage not to give up during many challenges in my life.
So, my friend, whatever you tackle, such as writing, consider the carping of the critic for what it is. Mine it for any truth that may be constructive. And most of all, get up and keep on going.
Chapter 1: Anglo-Saxon, Latin, Vikings
Chapter 2: Norman French, Latin
Chapter 3: Shakespeare and cliches
Chapter 4: King James Bible
Chapter 5: Science jargon
Chapter 6: Empire and the world
Chapter 7: Dictionary and Dr. Johnson
Chapter 8: America and the Melting Pot
Chapter 9: Internet and techno-jargon
Chapter 10: Globalism and many flavors
Invasions, art, literature, science, tech, world empire, New World, ... English is alive and ever evolving. And it's been estimated about 1.5 billion people speak English. Of a population of 7.5 billion, that's 20% of the world.
Therefore English is the "Write Stuff" for a big slice of the world.
The author, Donald Maass facilitated the workshop. He started by stating that he saw more emotion in the short ads of last Superbowl than many of the manuscripts he was reviewing at the time.
Here is one such example from Superbowl Ad 2017, a 60 second beer ad, which may be what he was talking about:
The workshop was intense. And I would do it again. But in this short post, I can only convey a key point .
As in any writing, there are many ways and styles. No right or wrong way. The attendees spent the day exploring that. But in the end, the reader is sovereign.
Yet the mark of good fiction is that it changes us, the reader. And we care about the characters on the journey. We make an emotional connection with them. Their journey is our journey. Their struggles are our struggles. It becomes part of our long term memory.
What came to mind was the running theme in The Lord of the Rings movies. That emotional connection with the struggle is why this is my favorite scene.
In destroying the ring, Sam's impossible quest is our quest. His struggle is our struggle. As he sums it up: There is some good in this world...And it's worth fighting for.
And to sum up the workshop in three words, what the author must do for the reader is...
Give them hope.
And so with hope, I start of another thread.
Write Stuff.
Our journey as writers is making the stuff to connect. And it's worth writing for!
When writer's block hits (especially when I'm on the computer), I am tempted to fritter away time on a myriad computer games or wander about the Internet. Sometimes I need a jump start to get the words flowing.
One of the best motivators installed on my computer is the game Scrabble. When stuck, I take a short breather playing a game or two.
My computer opponent sometimes displays unfamiliar words. These times, the handy dictionary on the board is at my disposal, so I can easily look them up. And I learn some new words for the day! After a game, words start to flow, again.
And the other up sides? The computer does not get mad when I win. I don't feel guilty playing this computer game. And it gets my mind on words, again.
What games - computer, mind, otherwise? - do you play for writing inspiration?
One recent weekend, my husband and I visited family and friends in Colorado Springs. Fortunate for us, the Summer Music Festival was going on at Colorado College. Since 1984, this music festival has been an intensive three-week program for 45 advanced musicians. One of our friends regularly sponsors a student at these festivals and he invited us for one of the Concerto Readings.
First on the program that day was Ran Kampel from Tel-Aviv Israel. He read through the Concerto for Clarient and Orchestra, Op. 57, by Carl Nielsen (1865 - 1931), one of the most difficult pieces written for clarinet.
Second, was Kathryn Brooks, who received both her bachelor and master of music degrees from Cleveland Institute of Music. She performed Bassoon Concerto in B flat Major, K. 191 by W. A. Mozar (1756 - 1791)
I enjoyed these readings even more than regular performances. The student gets immediate feedback from the masters as he/she does a first reading of the piece. A second performance of the same piece follows as the student plays with the critique in mind.
Having studied music myself, I find the insight of the masters invaluable, especially when I hear the difference between the first and second performances.
For a sample of some of the performances: click here.
This process reminds me of a method to fine tune the craft of writing. After a story is written, the masters' critique can pick out ways to improve the piece and create a better connection with the audience.
China ready? Are we having a fancy dinner or what? Not quite.
When Nathan Seidle asks the question - Is it China ready? - it pertains to a new product. Can he produce 10,000 units for this giant in the world market? There is even a website dedicated to this: areyouchinaready
Nathan shared lessons at the 2009 EntConnect conference of SparkFun’s recent China tour. His group learned such lessons as how their manufacturing works and the scale of it. They discovered new products and how they were done.
Often hardware and software are protected by patents and copyrights. But many, like SparkFun, take the OSH - Open Source Hardware - approach. OSH, for example, openly shares documents that illustrate how to make their electronic systems. In additon to OSH, creating modular electronic building blocks helps the hobbyists and designers to more easily develop their own gadgets.
This OSH strategy of putting their hardware designs in the public domain encourages the world to use and improve their products thus spurring ingenuity and innovation.
Nathan’s company, SparkFun, has benefited from the China - USA OSH cycle. USA design-> improved by China -> China design -> improved by USA -> …. And the improved products, which originated from OSH, are not the property of one particular entity. They are open to all to use, improve and enjoy.
Both SparkFun employees and their customers participated in this race which put the “Spark” and “Fun” into SparkFun.
What does this have to do with writing? Writers often check out websites and blogs of those who offer their wisdom to improve the craft. This is our OSH - Open Source Help. And the bloggers also benefit by gathering a following and getting their name out there.
Two examples of such "open source help" sites that I follow for help are:
In the beginning, Nathan Seidle, CEO of SparkFun, had
No Knowledge
No Plan
No Tools.
No Plan? As he explained to the 2009 EntConnect conference, Nathan had no plan but to relate to his current customers.
There is a parallel to writers. One type makes a detailed outline of his/her story and fills it in. This MO is much like the entrepreneur that has a detailed business plan, which is required for business loans requests or doing business with the government.
Then there is the intuitive - write by the seat of the pants - writer who has no plan but to fill the need to write. This is much like Nathan who maxed out his credit cards and launched a business from his room.
What worked for Nathan was that he fit into what Chris Anderson coined in "Wired" magazine - the "Long Tail of Economics." Nathan found a market for a large number of unique items in small quantities - the long tail. Also, his plan to relate to his current customers drove innovation and synergy with other entrepreneurs.
One great example was LilyPad, the next generation of e-textile modules for the Wearable Electronics Do-it-Yourself enthusiasts. E-textiles are hardware and software modules that interact with the environment, sown into clothes with conductive threads .
Likewise, the intuitive writers comes up with ideas as they writes and their story take them places that they would have missed if they stuck to their rigid, detailed plan. Serendipity!
Hmmm. What "Long Tail" market is out there for writers?
At the turn of the century (2000),Tulsa native Nathan Seidle started work on his electrical engineering degree at the University of Colorado in Boulder. His junior year, a programmer for Nathan's microprocessor project burned out, and he searched for a suitable replacement for it. In his quest, Nathan discovered a dearth of resources to purchase electronic parts in small quantities. For students like him, who design and develop prototypes, small quantities are a good thing.
The Plato quote - necessity, who is the mother of invention - came into play to fill this void in the marketplace. During his junior year in college, Nathan maxed out his credit cards and built a website to cater to customers - the designers, the developers, the hobbyists - like him. Thus, SparkFun began in January 2003, run out of his room.
By the time this electrical engineer graduated in 2004, SparkFun had grown to support Nathan full-time and another employee. As Nathan told his story to the 2009 EntConnect conference, he now has 27 employees and does business in 100 countries.
There are so many lessons here for writers. Finding a need, building a platform, and going for it like Nathan did, maxing out his credit cards and just doing it. And in the mean time growing your business and having fun!
This is the code of the “Queen Mother of Direct Mail.”
Selling construction additions to homes was one of Patty Coldwater’s tough direct mail assignments. Other similar solicitations rewarded contracts with a percentage off the construction job or a free air conditioning system. These did not generate much response from mailings.
At the 2009 EntConnect conference, Patty outlined how she got back to basics.
Question: What was she trying to accomplish?
Answer: A face to face meeting of a potential customer with a salesperson.
Question: What would be the reward for this face to face meeting?
Answer: Starbucks!
Patty got the desired boomerang effect as potential customers took a second look at the offer. Home owners scheduled face to face meetings to get their Starbucks coupon. And some of those meetings resulted in contracts. A few hundred dollars of Starbucks generated tens of thousands in sales.
Don’t’ underestimate the power of Starbucks.
As a writer, what is my desired boomerang effect to read my works and spread the word? Starbucks? Hmmmmm.
Will see. Definitely need to get creative to reward my audience.
At the 2009 EntConnect conference, Patty Coldwater told her real life stories of how, as a professional marketer, she had attracted customers. One of her jobs was to convert clients' expiring warranties to paid service agreements.
Today’s wisdom would be to contact potential customers with email or call over the phone. Yet, as employees now are very likely to change jobs 40% to 60% of the time in a year, databases with emails and phone numbers quickly become out of date.
Understanding her potential customers, Patty figured how they would respond best to a solicitation. Most worked in the field, away from their desks. They did not have ready access to a computer to get email nor a phone at the office.
What worked well was the old fashioned direct mail with a reply card to call a toll free number and extend the service warrantee. Using her hook - reward what you are trying to accomplish - those who responded got a prize, like a fishing lure, a calculator, or a seven in one survival tool. These were tokens, but items her customers were interested in.
Knowing her potential customer allowed Patty generated a 300% increase in sales.
Who am I targeting as my audience? Are they being rewarded for what I am trying to accomplish? This evolving writer still has much to learn. I am grateful for the wisdom Patty shared at the 2009 EntConnect conference.
“My Goal is to be the Queen Mother of Direct Mail.”
Patty Coldwater had said this during a job interview. And that title stuck. Her business card actually reads “Queen Mother of Direct Mail" as VP of Marketing for TMR Direct (a division of The Mail Room Inc.)
One of the greatest challenges I face as an evolving writer is marketing. I love to ensconce myself behind the ivory tower of the keyboard and unleash my creativity. But stepping out in the real world to sell my wares? Well, that’s another story.
How do we sell services in a tight economy and succeed at it?
As companies strive to save money, fewer people are asked to do more work. Yet, opportunities to outsource are out there. Patty presented her experience of "Direct Marketing Ideas that Work" as the third speaker at the 2009 EntConnect Conference.
The following blogs will share Patty's lessons that apply can to any field where goods and services are sold. Especially writers.
One of her memorable morsels of wisdom: “Reward what you are trying to accomplish.”
Winston Churchill once said, “It's not enough that we do our best; sometimes we have to do what's required.”
For the energy crisis, what is required?
The previous five blogs covered key points from Dr. Bartlett’s “Arithmetic, Population and Energy” speech at the 2009 EntConnect conference.
In summary,
(1) To find the doubling time for any percentage of steady growth, use this simple formula: 70 divided by the percentage (70/%). Hence, 7% steady growth per year equates to a doubling time of 10 years.
(2) We saw with the case of the doubling of grain on a chess board and the splitting bacteria in a jar, steady growth equates to huge escalations over short periods of time.
Simple arithmetic tells us that population growth and/or growth in the rates of consumption of resources cannot be sustained. Understanding the consequences of growth, we can see trouble coming and take proactive action to avert disaster. Most important when acting early, we are more likely to control the factors to sustain living in an ethical and healthy way.
If we ignore the red flags, zero population growth will happen anyway. As we do nothing, factors, out of our control, will suppress life and promote death. The resulting human suffering could be incalcuable.
Space confines detailed solutions. Thoughtful community planning and education are a start. Exploring and developing renewable energy resources are another. And let’s not forget one of the most important factors, people who are willing to think.
Solomon expressed this timely wisdom:
A prudent man sees danger and takes refuge,
but the simple keep going and suffer for it.
Proverbs 22:3
(New International Version)
On that spiritual note, instead of "In Growth We Trust" may we choose "In God We Trust" when we tackle our great challenges.
Remember Charles Dicken’s Christmas Carol when Ebenezer Scrooge offered his “final solution” to the poverty problem? “If they would rather die, they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population.”
Chilling.
In his “Arithmetic, Population and Energy” speech at the 2009 EntConnect conference, Dr. Bartlett regarded overpopulation as “The Greatest Challenge” facing humanity. If steady growth continues unchecked, zero population growth will happen, anyway, as we expend our non-rewable resources. High birth rates will drop and low death rates will rise until they are equal. How this happens may not be pretty.
What are our options to control population growth?
First, let’s look at some factors that promote overpopulation: motherhood, immigration, medicine, public health, sanitation, peace, law and order, scientific agriculture to produce more food, safety, clean air and water, etc. What we consider as good is bad because it makes the problem worse.
Now consider what curbs overpopulation: abstinence, contraception, abortion, small families, no immigration, diseases, war, murder, euthanasia, ethnic cleaning, violent crime, famine, accidents, disasters, pollution, smoking, AIDS, etc. Most of what we consider bad is good because it “decreases the surplus population.”
Good grief!
Dr. Bartlett regards sustainability as his “Great Challenge." “Can you think of any problem in any area of human endeavor on any scale, from microscopic to global, whose long-term solution is in any demonstrable way aided, assisted, or advanced by further increases in population, locally, nationally, or globally?”
He got me there.
How do we sustain living without unleashing the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse?
There must be a way to promote a more pleasant outcome. And that will be the subject of the final blog on this topic.
During the energy crisis, Peak Oil was quite the buzz in the blogosphere. Remember when gasoline approached, if not passed, $5.00 per gallon? The gnawing thought in the back of my brain is when gas will shoot up like that, again.
Dr. Bartlett articulated the Peak Oil concept during his “Arithmetic, Population and Energy” speech at the 2009 EntConnect conference. Actually, I first heard Dr. Bartlett’s lecture during the 1970s energy crisis and he still had many of those same charts. Key indicators pointed that, at a steady rate of consumption, the world’s oil production would peak, sometime in the late 1990s or early 2000s. That is, like, now, and we are living on borrowed time.
As shown in the doubling of grain on the chess board, consumption during the next doubling period is always greater than all that of previous history. Therefore, even a modest growth of consumption can escalate very quickly.
At a convention of petroleum geologists and engineers in 1956, the late Dr. Hubbert presented his calculations that “the peak of US oil and gas production could be expected to occur between 1966 and 1971.” No one took him seriously then. Yet, the data from the Department of Energy showed that the actual peak was 1970, followed by a very rapid decline.
Professor Bartlett put forth his famous quote on the public perception of energy consumption: “The greatest shortcoming of the human race is our inability to understand the exponential function.”
Remember the last blog of the splitting bacteria in the jar? Assume the world’s oil reserves equal the amount we have already used in the history of the planet.
What time is?
11:59.
One more doubling time (10 years for 7% growth), the world’s oil reserve will be consumed.
As the legendary Chinese curse says – May we live in interesting times.
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